Pain & Beauty: Coping with Adjustment

*Maybe you’ve started a new venture but don’t see the fruit of your sacrifice, time, and hard work just yet.
*Maybe you’ve left behind an unhealthy relationship but have never felt so lonely.

*Maybe you’ve secured a new job but haven’t found your “happy place” of loving what you do.

I’m sure January 1st marked a new beginning for many reading this blog. “Start over,” “Leave behind,” and “Begin again” may have saturated the conversations of those who looked forward to the fresh start a new year brings. At times, God commands us to wait, stand still, or endure (Psalm 27:14). However, when His response to us requires something new, it can invoke an adjustment period that is not the most comfortable.

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noun: adjustment; plural noun: adjustments
  1. a small alteration or movement made to achieve a desired fit, appearance, or result. The process of adapting or becoming used to a new situation.

Your adjustment period may be characteristic of you “clashing” with your newly found, God-led choice. Perhaps your “joy” for a fresh start has not yet caught up with your current circumstance.

What you’re feeling now doesn’t seem to make sense as you’ve made the first steps towards embracing change. You may feel disappointed, disgusted, or even stressed at the fact that you are a believer of God and can’t claim happiness as totally yours.

If God is such a good God, shouldn’t all of His choices for us feel good?

A trip down memory lane…

Let’s briefly examine the life of Sarah – biblical figure, wife, mother, and warrior in her own right. Genesis 12 would reveal an adjustment period of a lifetime for Sarah and her husband, Abraham. And I’m sure that she would wholeheartedly answer “NO” to the question above as a first-hand witness of God’s choices not always feeling good.

God would lead the couple to unfamiliar territory, but this would not be your normal family road trip adventure.


Their journey would be filled with personal/family drama, uncertainty, and the periodic turmoil of what they lacked as a couple who could not have children.

DANGER Genesis 12: 10-20, Genesis 20: 1-3 There were threats of Sarah being permanently captured by foreign rulers with involuntary separation from her husband.
SHAME/LACK Genesis 11:30, Genesis 15:2 Sarah was barren. Only the intervention of God could help her birth a child in a culture that did not normally mirror women like her.
CHAOTIC HOME LIFE Genesis 16:5, Genesis 21: 8-10 Sarah & Abraham utilized a surrogate (Hagar) to carry a son. This caused tension and strife between Abraham, Sarah, and Hagar.

I’m sure Sarah would have never thought that her initial move with Abraham would turn into the disappointment and discouragement that accompanied her adjustment period. I can imagine that the excitement of “starting over” was frequently overshadowed by the many “ups and downs” of a life lived as a woman of faith, wife, and mother.

“the struggle is real, but God is even more real…”

What you feel in the manner of discomfort during your particular adjustment is NORMAL. It may feel like the journey of your “new place” will not be worth it. However, God has not changed his mind about your redemption. You are on his mind even now. The pain of today will make one beautiful testimony of empowerment, healing, and transformation.

Below are some suggestions for coping during your time of adjustment (referenced from my February 2018 bible study):

  1. Set regular & private moments with God. This is crucial for healthy spirituality and the ability to gain intimacy with the Lord as you depend on Him for the peace that only He can give (Philippians 4:7).
  2. Get active. Go for a walk, run, or swim–exercise is known to improve one’s mood and sleep at night.
  3. Look yourself in the mirror and face the reflection that God created. Remember that you are God’s woman – not by this world’s standards – just God’s woman. I’m sure Sarah felt inadequate on many of days.
  4. Find enjoyment in the “right now.” Find meaning and purpose in 2018 — this month, this week. LIVE, LOVE, LAUGH as if this was your last day on earth. Yes, we all have plans and future goals – but becoming infatuated with the future can prevent us from missing out on some pretty awesome moments RIGHT NOW.  Read a great book. Visit with friends. Take a trip to another part of your state. Do the things that remind you that LIFE is worth living RIGHT NOW.

“In the same way I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born,” says the Lord. “If I cause you the pain, I will not stop you from giving birth to your new nation,” says your God. – Isaiah 66:9

Feel free to continue in my musings about Sarah by listening to the latest bible study/life application session concerning her struggles and imminent rescue. CLICK HERE.

Happy #WomensHistoryMonth!! I look forward to connecting with you again next month!

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4 thoughts on “Pain & Beauty: Coping with Adjustment

  1. Thank you for sharing! I appreciate this part of your ministry which is certainly relevant. My prayer is that you continue to share the God-given wisdom and insight that heals and sets captives free.
    Grace and Peace🦋

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you for that Piece. What a blessing knowing that you are empowering others. Your thoughtfulness and love is being shared at home and abroad. May God continue to give you the strength and the courage to spread the good news.
    Love Always.
    Anita Howell

    Liked by 1 person

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